On the Move

I'm sitting in the Seattle Tacoma airport waiting for my flight to Denver and musing about the past two weeks. My long anticipated reunion trip is over halfway done.
Emilie came down for a day to visit my home and I drove back up with her to visit hers. After a few days hanging out in the birthplace of the Republican party (Jackson, MI apparently) and hearing about a real life super hero, and visiting Ryan, Em and I flew over to visit Candice in Tacoma. We went all over the place (Seattle, Tacoma, Portland), drank a lot of coffee (Sattelite, Forza, Mandolin cafe, Lava Java, Espresso Vivace, Peet's, etc.), caught up with more friends (Jon, Stacy, Kari) and had a blast.
Today I fly out to Denver to visit My Grandma, Aunt, Uncle, and cousins. Like I mentioned before I'm really excited about seeing them since I haven't visited since before Dad died.
After a few days there I'm off to New Mexico to visit a few more friends before heading back home and getting ready for my next step. The next step is Guatemala! After many emails and getting things set up, I finally know that I'm heading down the 4rth of February (like 2 weeks!). I'll be there a month cramming as much information about coffee into my head as I can.
I'm really excited about this, but really nervous too. After spending time with some awesome coffee people at Counter Culture Coffee, I'm wondering whether starting a shop is something I want to do very soon. There is so much to learn in the coffee business and so many aspects of it it's kind of overwhelming. So while a shop is still in mind and a goal in the future, I'm considering working for a shop or company when I get done with my internship to get more experience and meet more people. I'm really excited about how relational coffee is. If you make the effort, you can meet great people and big names really easy and they're all willing to help and are excited for you.
I'm also nervous about going to Guatemala because I'll be away from home again. And this time without my Race buddies. It was so good to see all my friends from the race doing so well being back and getting things started and moving on in life, but it's been hard for me. I mean, I've got a plan and this are on it's way, but I didn't have a smooth transition to being home. I didn't want to talk to people, but I didn't want to be alone. I wanted to be home, but I felt out of place. It's been very emotional for me. When you're gone for a year, things don't go on hold and wait for you to come back, they just keep moving. Friends move and marry and have kids and get engaged. In some ways it was like I never left, but in some ways it's all so different and not me. In a sense going to Guatemala is like going into isolation. Away from all my comforts. I'll probably be living by myself, and while I'll be working with the Roberts every day, they're their own family with their own thing and I'll only be there for a season.
I'm lonely, and it hurts, and I don't know what the answer is to fix it. God has shown me so many times lessons through hurt, but at some point it just seems mean. I know there's a plan, but it's so hard sometimes.
But these things pass. God is good, and He will take care of me.